awkward CHIC: The Evolution of Taylor Momsen, and Unrelated, Freakshow

Taylor Momsen intrigues me. I mean, she started out as this fresh-faced little ingenue, and turned into a Courtney Love impersonator overnight. That's a big transformation. I couldn't look at her without flinching during her mullet phase, but now that she's got new, admittedly fake, locks, let's take a little look at some of her recent ensembles.

From the neck up, I love this first look. The Ray-Bans are nice against the super-feminine waves, and the pink lippie is cute and young. As for the outfit itself, hmm. The boots, which I love, are mildly whorish with the booty shorts and belly shirt, and the plaid shirt only ups the washed up '90s rockstar factor. As for this second look, here the hair's not working for me. The bangs toned down the slutty cheap wig effect of her extensions. That dress is short and low-cut enough, but when you add the sheer thigh highs, it crosses the line into expensive, ahem, lady of the night. And the intense black liner paired with baby blue shadow is not helping. And this last look...hmm. Let's examine. Fedora-esque hat worn in a non-ironic way, shooties, and a cropped, zipped, wide-leg jumpsuit. No. Just no. It looks like a costume, and a bad costume at that. Like she's trying to be the leader of an undercover jazz band from the '70s.

And here the hair is doing it again. When it's that straight, you can really tell that it's not real. I actually think she's working the raccoon liner here (it's probably the serious brat face she's giving). The sheer thigh highs are back, but with the shorts and the extra layer of the cardigan on top, they work. Now if she'd just crack a smile...I love that this middle look is from a "Fresh Faces" Clinique event. This girl does not work a fresh face. Ever. Even the Gossip Girl writers make fun of her eyeliner. Her hair looks decent here, and I even like the oversized sweater dress and sheer tights combo, because on her teensy frame it actually works. I just wish she'd done a more delicate shoe to contrast the heaviness of the sweater. This third picture just makes me laugh. If she wanted to hide any part of her face, I'd think she'd hide the Courtney Love eyeliner that everyone makes fun of. Not her mouth. What I love about this outfit is that it's supposed to be her school UNIFORM. Let's compare her uber-mini tulip skirt to the pleated plaid skirts of the other two girls. Someone's out of uniform. And seriously, that skirt is two inches long. How is that practical to sit down in during class all day? I know Gossip Girl isn't about practicality, but seriously.

Here her hair just looks like it belongs on Malibu Barbie, which would be fine if it didn't go against her entire aesthetic. That dress says emo '90s Wiccan. The hair says Barbie. It's like someone put Barbie's head on the body of one of the girls from The Craft. I actually really like these last two looks (although if she's going to do the platinum blond thing, she needs to touch up her roots). This gown is gorgeous, and she's totally rocking the smokey eye and nude hue. There's interesting detail at the bodice, I love the asymmetrical draping and chain-ish detail, and the thigh high slit is very on-trend. The fishnets are pushing it a little over the edge. With that much leg cleavage you don't need the fishnets. The nude heels were a really good. This last outfit is my absolute fave. The little leather jacket over the knit cardigan is a nice juxtaposition of hard and soft, and I love the dark romantic vibe of the textural mini dress and lace tights.

Urban Decay Deluxe Eyeshadow in Freakshow, $18 at sephora.com: It came, it came, it came!!!! OMG so happy. It's everything I wanted it to be and more. First of all, the packaging is adorable. There's a mirror in the lid, the 'cover art' is quirky and fun and weird (in a good way), and I found out accidentally that the lids are removable, so you could theoretically get a bunch of these and switch out the lids, which is cute. As for the shadow itself, you get almost twice as much as you do with a regular Urban Decay shadow or with a MAC shadow for about $2-4 more, so it's a really good deal. It's a deep, red-based purple with just a hint of shimmer. I love this color. It's deep and dark enough that you can do a fab smokey eye, use it as a liner, and do just about anything, but it definitely reads as purple up to at least five feet away (I may have measured it out in front of the bathroom mirror). It looks so rich on, and the purple is insanely flattering to hazel, green, or brown eyes. Freakshow is really highly pigmented and extremely smooth, so you can do a sheer wash for a hint of purple or pack it on for an even, dark lid. On top of that, it's really smudgeable and blendable, but once you put it on, it stays put. I'm really impressed. These Deluxe shadows actually measure up. I'm craving Zero, sparkly black, and Underground, a golden fawn.